I think the lesson we’ve all learned in the past day is: Never, ever build a compound. When’s the last time that worked out well for anyone? If you’re reading this from a compound right now, please, reconsider your lifestyle. Try a cottage.
7:12 p.m. The stadium gets special glow stick training so we don’t mess up the halftime show. The pressure is on! We can’t let down Taboo and the rest of the Peas!
(Source: popwatch.ew.com)
I have been struck […] by the discord between people’s Facebook lives and what they say in private. On Facebook they have been on an amazing vacation to exotic beaches. In person they confess that the vacation was a desperate attempt to save a marraige. On Facebook they have been to gliteratee tech conferences. In person they confess they haven’t been able to sleep for months, and are on anti-anxiety medication from the stress of financial pressures on their company. It is a strange case of schadenfreude for me to hear this, knowing that I had been jealous of their beach time and glamor. What’s interesting is that this feel-bad Facebook effect seems to come from a distinct source: not-so-close Facebook friends.
Jay-Z was on [Late Night with David Letterman] and, when asked how he escaped the ghettos, said: ‘Not everyone had talent, so they ended up dead or in jail. Fortunately, I had extreme talent and a little bit of drive.’ Jay-Z, like many rappers, suffers from a condition where the body produces too much self-belief. Being a celebrity, he can afford to treat it with cocaine.
(Source: thescrivenersfancy.com)
From what I’ve witnessed modern day neo-burlesque is mostly a way for hipster-ish girls and kinda goth-inclined girls and other people trying to make up for their inane anti-personalities to feel sophisticated and interesting because they’re doing something that was popular in the first half of the 20th century with a heavy veneer of striped socks, massive amounts of eyeliner and so on while being very half-assed and boring about it, like an even more horrible version of the Dresden Dolls.
(Source: The A.V. Club)
Grrr just realised that the post man came yesterday 2 deliver my internet grrr now i have 2 go 2 the post office n pick it up oh wat a drainer!
The Honeypot Employees had a generous ration of beer at morning tea (called the beer break), lunch, afternoon tea and when they clocked off. Some of the trade supervisors were able to float between bars during the day, eventually leading to a permanent state of inebriation.
Nearly time 4 Bubs 2 go 2 bed thank god a lil nap 4 me then have 2 start cooking dinner roast chicken n veg hmmm Yummy this day has gone so quick! Miss my man 2day 4 sum unknown reason lol
Getting up early is good Bcoz i can get more fings dun in the mornin n relax in the afternoon already had my shower dun 1 load of washing had breakfast now 2 tidy up b4 mil Cum’s n can relax the rest of the day Yay sounds good 2 me!
So a few months back a friend gets a friend request on Facebook. He accepts it, thinking it was a person he met at a party. It turns out to be a random person that his sister went to school with, who for the sake of discussion we will dub Carla. Carla is in her early twenties and lives in the western suburbs of Melbourne. She is married with one child and her hobbies include bingo and sleeping. But her main time-waste is posting inane status updates on her Facebook wall like the one displayed above. Carla does this every single day; posting updates filled with text speak, run-on sentences, and a lack of punctuation. For months my friend and I have pointed and mocked these updates, bringing up her favourite spellings (fings! dun!) and counting the number of naps she has.
I think it’s time to share this with the world. I’m going to be posting some of my favourite updates over the next few months, or at least until the well dries up. Welcome to the world of Carla’s inane Facebook updates.
